In Dave's Words

Combine passion, focus and zeal with only slightly misappropriated leadership and you can so quickly have contemporary Pharisees and legalism. Any time we take our experiences and perspectives and turn them into formulas or expectations for other people, we take over the role of the Holy Spirit in the lives of other people…all-the-while using our interpretation of scripture as justification.  There is a razor fine line between using the gift of prophesy, holding out the expectations of God, and turning it into today’s version of Pharisees, prescribing how to live out God’s expectations.

Any time we encounter a persuasive and charismatic leader who has applied scripture (to their context) in a way that looks like success, the first thing we do is try to copy their extra-biblical actions in the same way they did. Out of a very right motive to be effective, we very wrongly make a formula out of our experiences or that of others. And the moment we do that, we assume the role of the Holy Spirit. When something “works” for us, we then presume to prescribe how much money people should give, how people should use their time, how people should pray or worship, who people should spend their time with, how to raise their children and the list could go on and on. You can smell a Pharisee a mile away by the stench of constant criticism on their lips.   

The problem goes waaayyy back. Then Jesus said to the crowds and to his disciples, “The teachers of religious law and the Pharisees are the official interpreters of the law of Moses. So practice and obey whatever they tell you, but don’t follow their example. For they don’t practice what they teach. They crush people with unbearable religious demands and never lift a finger to ease the burden. (Matt 23)

Do we as leaders trust the power of the Holy Spirit in the lives of other followers? Do I really think that He really needs me to change the hearts of people who are not living the way I think they should live? Am I that full of pride that I think I can talk or convince people to change? Am I that self-centered that I don’t assume that the Holy Spirit is working in people on issues that He wants to change rather than behavior that I think they should change? Wouldn’t I be a lot more free and void of unnecessary stress if I really trusted that the Holy Spirit is doing a fine job of changing people without my help in my time?

Unfortunately for me…and those around me…I relate a whole lot more to the religious leaders than the woman at the well; to that oldest son instead of the prodigal. I am terrified at the thought, after a career of “ministry”, to one day hear, “I never knew you.” (Matt 7) I suppose that it’s a good fear.

Dave’s book entitled: Hungry For Life: A Vision of the Church that Would Transform the World has now been released and is available for sale. For more information you can click The Book tab above.

Again, the purpose of writing the book is to expand the message of our vision and mobilize more churches and groups into international compassion. If you are interested in buying the book, you can call our office to order a copy. While the book is now available for sale through channels such as Blessings, Amazon, Barnes & Noble, etc, for the initial release, Hungry For Life is making it available through our office. HFL purchased an initial print run and it would be helpful if you purchased them from our office. Once this run has been sold, we will recommend people buy it through Blessings Christian Marketplace, online or in their stores.

Here are the details if you’re interested in getting a hold of a copy:
Cost: $20 (includes taxes)
Shipping: You can either pick one up from our office in Chilliwack or we can mail you one for $4.
Purchasing: You can either just stop by if you’re in the Chilliwack area or call our office and dial reception at 604-703-0223 ext 107 to order by phone.
Payment Options: Visa, MasterCard, Cheque, or of course Cash.

Although I do believe that the internal culture of the Church in North America is going through a cultural change for the better, territorialism and chiefdoms are very much still the accepted norm. For the most part, church (or para-church for that matter) is still seen as religious business rife with brands to protect, money to guard, competition to watch, market trends to be conferenced about, customers to vie for and the most “successful” leaders are the ones with entrepreneurial as opposed to shepherding gifts.

Molded by our commercial and well oiled free market, the machine of church continues to produce well programmed constituents…but rarely life change. And in addition to the world shaping the church with its mold, I also believe that this territorialism is perpetuated by insecure spiritual leaders who base their self worth on free market metrics applied to “their” church. And while most of us can wax about strategy and mission as the outward motivation of the pursuit of church success…there is often an equally, sometimes more powerful motive than God’s glory.

Our glory.

The reality is that something very unhealthy inside of us makes the subtle switch when things start going…good. Attendance, giving, outwardly successful programs, numbers of baptisms and converts…all opportunities to feed the child in all of us that still needs value and validation. Is our commitment for excellence, results, change, etc…for the benefit of God’s glory (and those we serve) or are we really more driven to be reliant on the praise of man for our value? Self-lessness is not some place to arrive but rather a journey of continuing to make sure that when people see me they continually recognize the face and heart of the Savior.       

As Keith Green wrote and sang…and as I sang this morning:

Oh, Lord you’re beautiful.

Your face is all I seek.

And when, your eyes, are on this child,

Your grace abounds to me.

I want to take your word and shine it all around,

But first help me to just live it Lord.

And when I’m doing well, help me to never seek a crown.

For my reward is giving glory to you.

Empathy…I read this definition:  “The ability to understand or enter into another persons reality, motives, situation and feelings.” It’s the ability to remove yourself from the center of your understanding and chose to see situations through another persons reality. Really…the opposite is self-centeredness and pride.

Our default setting is to evaluate, judge, and compare everyone to our experience, reality, sandards and motives. We can’t help but define normal as we ourselves are. We so easily think that our “normal” or our standards are the most right. We judge or critic people because they are not like us. They don’t feel like us, think like us, act like us or value what we value. While I obviously believe in absolutes of right and wrong, I also believe that we should rarely think we absolutely know what they are and absolutely know how to live them out.

Without empathy, we generalize, stereotype, and judge. Without empathy, it’s impossible to treat people the way Christ did. Without empathy, it’s impossible to live a compassionate life. Without empathy, we push people away by our self-centered expectations of them to become like us. Without empathy, we focus on the weaknesses of people rather than on their gifts and strengths.  

It’s much easier to empathize with those we like more or have invested the time to get to know. That is not the test of Christ-like self-emptying. While empathy might be easier for some, we can all learn to see and understand from the perspective of whoever it is we are relating too. We can all choose to shelve our generalizations and stereotypes before passing judgement. The result will be an ever increasing community of grace dispensers that draw people by the attractiveness of our humility and Christ-likeness.

A few months ago, it occurred to me that the reason I wish that people would change has much more to do with my benefit than their’s. When I really stop to evaluate my heart and when I stop and listen to people complain about other people, the reason we wish people would change is because it would somehow make my life easier or more…comfortable.

Oh…sure we talk about the need for people to become more like Jesus…and I don’t doubt that we mean it. But humanly speaking, I am usually ticked off that people aren’t “normal”…like me more than I am that they’re not like Jesus. If people would see things my way…act like I would…do what I want, the way I want it done…then I would be happier and my life would be easier. The more people don’t see things my way…don’t act like I would…or don’t do what i would do, the way I would do it…the more frustrated I get. My reason for wanting people around me to change is self-centered.

Here are a few questions to ask yourself about how much your self plays into people needing to change:

• Is your emotional well being tied to people agreeing with you? Do you get defensive when people don’t see things your way?
• Do you feel the overwhelming urge to control the way people do things because of your need for things turn out your way?…which is obviously the best way
• Why do you get so frustrated by how people around you act?
• Do people joke about you having a controlling or obsessive nature?
• How much emotional energy do you spend on situations where people don’t agree with you or where people don’t appreciate your way of doing things?
• Is your sense of “ok-ness” dependant on being stroked by those you lead or lead with?

Those with the gift of being able to influence others need to constantly take stock of our motivations. There is a fine line between manipulation and good leadership. For the sake of this argument, I view manipulation as trying to change people around me for my benefit or to make them like me. Good leadership, on the other hand, influences people toward becoming more like Christ.